It’s that time of the year again when single women like me are reminded of how depressing it is not to have a hubby to take you out on a long walk on the beach or a romantic dinner in your favorite restaurant. Is it just me or is the world becoming grander in celebrating events like these? Roses come in bouquets. Stuffed animals are disturbingly wrapped in enormous sizes. Dinners are reserved in the most expensive restaurants, not to mention booking bands to surprise the lucky lady. And those are just the usual stuff, the real creative guys would whisk you away to road trips, picnics and overnight travel to some surprisingly romantic places. Is this starting to sound like a cheesy chick flick you force you boyfriend to watch on date night?
My Valentines Day ritual usually ends with a date, a tradition I’ve kept for as long as I could remember. My dad would take my mom and I (and now my little sister too) to have dinner at our favorite restaurant and they’d talk about how dad made his first move on her in a Finance class, how they started dating and how they ended up staying together for 20 years. I’ve memorized it down to every detail but it still never gets too old. It’s constant reminder that when something clicks, when something just fits, it works.
But I’ve always wondered what happens in between, after the fireworks and before we reminisce. A friend from my GEEKdom once told me that relationships are like space missions (real romantic right? ooooohhhh SPACE), they’re rough and exhausting and requires A LOT of perseverance and patience. You have to put in the hours because there is no shortcut. But when you get to launch and you see how much you’ve accomplished, it’s euphoria unlike any other.
My other V-day ritual is hanging out with my 2 best buds but they’re both very busy so I’ll devote my time to blogging about what I usually tell them during this season.
ENOUGH WITH THE EXCUSES
Relationships, they’re not easy but we’re usually just making it so much harder. I remember my best friend complaining about how women are so confusing. He rambles about mood swings and being cryptic. For the guys, not all ladies are that way. You end up with riddles because you chose to be with her. If you really can’t handle it then find someone who doesn’t confuse you but if you’re willing to compromise then know that we’re cryptic because we’re either scared or embarrassed to spell it out. We believe you to be capable to read between the lines and determined to keep on trying until you get us. For the ladies, give your guys a break. Sometimes, the good old truth is the way to go (trust me I have a dozen guy best friends who will back this up). I know these are not the only things we struggle with, there are some which are petty while others are complex and are difficult to even discuss. I’m not a relationship guru, a far cry from it, but I think the most important thing is that we try. My parents never had it easy as every relationship will not be but it’s not the cue to wave the white flag and leave.
If they’re worth it, don’t give up.
And this is where I say I won’t give up. Even if you’re unaware and I have no plans of telling you in the near future, know that I haven’t given up. Like an undone ship, I’m not yet ready to launch. I will take my time (let me work on myself) and I’ll see you when we’re both ready to fly.