how to get through a bad day

Ask why.

I’ve been told one too many times by one too many people that the best way to get through a bad say is to just ‘choose’ to be happy, and I do believe that happiness is a choice. The important consideration though is how.

How do you choose to be happy when your hormones have been betraying you for the past 24 hours or more? 

Over the years, I’ve learned simple remedies, like I’m content snuggling under the covers and letting the pages of Murakami lighten my mood or munching down a whole pizza – yes, by myself. They’re the fairy dust to my weary soul.

Pizza Bianca’s my current favorite, but a simple pepperoni or cheese pizza’s perfect too.

I know I mentioned Murakami (and I’ve read most his words… twice, fine A LOT of times), but this is the book series I’m finishing up right now; they’re by Tahereh Mafi. You may wanna give it a read.

Although if the bad days keep recurring, you may wanna consider a different approach. Those little pockets of happiness we reserve for ourselves when we’ve had a particularly long week at work or taxing, borderline inhuman final exams are insignificant bandaids that may feign as solutions to what truly makes a ‘day’ bad.

I won’t pretend to be an expert, but from experience, I realized that often that the heavy feeling we get for, most likely, juvenile to no reason at all may be unresolved issues triggered by the most minute of events. They will keep nagging at us, capitalizing on the simplest flaw, until we finally resolve them from the roots. All that, it starts with one question:

Why?

#HappyPrideMonth

It’s time to strip and don the colors of the rainbow, people. It’s Pride Month! 

Every single one of my avid readers already knows that I’m a massive supporter of anything LGBT. I’ve talked about it on previous posts, written literature about it, even put up photos that signify my support for it (links below). If I could, I would wear a shirt that says ‘LGBT rights is human rights’ everywhere I went, but I don’t think my clients would appreciate me walking up a business meeting in a graphic tee.

BYE OUT THERE

But I do wanna celebrate this amazingly colorful month with you guys so I decided that I’m declaring this blogging month as an ‘All Pride Month’. It simply means daily posts (yes, yes it’s a huge responsibility) about anything pride-related – pictures, twitter trends, Youtuber features, movie recommendations, readings lists (paperback and Wattpad) and my usual opinions entries.

I want to make this as interactive as possible, so if there’s anything you want me want me to feature in the coming days, you can comment below or email them to me. Oh, and if you wanna show your support as well, feel free to make my rainbow header yours too.

That’s all for today, guys. Happy Pride Month!

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Graphics by: Rye Lee

Links (previous entries on LGBT): 

stacked: monthly book picks

True to my ever dorky self, I keep a list of books to watch out for every month. I have slight tendency to go haywire in a bookshop because of the need to purchase everything I get my hands on.

Does that happen to anyone else or is that just me?

If it happens to you too, then this list might help. These are books you can check out first so you don’t get lost in the sea of perfection that is books. If not, then these may be books you wanna start with. They’re all fun reads with a certain degree of social significance. Although all of them are already available, I’m aware that some books stores may not carry them yet, so you might want to check online to get them (e.g Amazan, Goodreads, etc). Anyway, onto the list.

1. The Mechanical by Ian Tregillis

If you’ve read any of Tregillis’ work, then you must be expecting a lot (like me, obviously). The first thing I read of his was the Milkweed Triptych where the retelling of the second World War was so vivid and believable; I could almost imagine British warlocks and Nazi super soldiers being introduced into history textbooks. After that, I just got every single book he wrote, and he has never failed to deliver the same amount creativity and intrigue since. I would go so far as saying that he’s one of my favorites from this genre.

At the core of The Mechanical, which is a new imagery for steam punk, is the age-old question of determinism versus one’s free will and how it relates to artificial intelligence. Despite the complexity of that, it’s told in a very engaging context where ‘clakkers’, mechanical men, are powered by alchemy to protect and defend the Brasswork Throne – now, the only superpower. Trust me, even if this isn’t usually a genre you go for, this book is a worthy read. It delves into a lot of different topics which I think you’ll enjoy.

2. Find Me by Laura van den Berg

It’s for the scifi-loving book lovers who gravitate towards strong female leads and a steady dose of mystery. The book chronicles Joy’s life after she discover she’s immune from an Alzheimer’s-like pandemic that wipes out most of the population and how she makes sense of the world by studying survivors of that disease.

3. The Unfortunate Importance of Beauty by Amanda Filipacchi

If you follow me on twitter, you would know that I’ve been raving about this book for awhile. The humorous and quirky writing style that Amanda took was so strategic and appropriate in delivering a stance on a very prominent social issue (that you all know I feel strongly about), the concept of beauty.

The book is about two friends, one ‘objectively’ beautiful and the other not (for lack of a better word), who attempt to make the people around them see who they truly are. Here’s the catch: they do it while masking their appearances. It’s a light and funny read with an undertone that persuades you to question your personal identity and how other people see it and shape it.

4. The Buried Giant by Kazuo Ishiguro

Much to my dismay, I have not read this book yet, but my recommendation is based on the massive postive reviews it got and the summary I was sent to read. I’m definitely getting a copy soon though. Also, I’ve supported ALL the books this author wrote which includes Never Let Me Go.

Personally, I loved the intimacy of the relationship between Axl and Beatrice as they remember their past and see how much effect it has on their future. I’ll definitely tell you on a different post if the book holds true to the summary I got.

5. Dirty Pretty Things by Michael Faudet

Faudet’s writing style and content is definitely not for everyone. There has been polarized views on the ‘dirty’ aspect of it. Personally, I thought it was sensual, but delivered with a certain degree of sophistication and humor that reads Faudet all the way.

I could keep describing this book to you and how it must have looked when I read this while walking around, shopping with a few friends, but I’d much rather leave you with quote that I think underlines how he was able to deliver a book that a lot of readers can keep referencing back to.

“She was a curious girl who loved the smell of old books, chasing butterflies and touching herself under the covers.”

So those are the books that are breaking my bank – okay, maybe just some of them. I tried to give you as much diversity as I could to cover everyone’s preferences. If you want more entries like this, you can email me or comment below. You know I love talking about my favorite books so if you enjoy reading about them too, I’d love to make more.

Also, there will be a massive announcement on the post after this so stay tuned – especially my fellow book geeks. You’ll love it.

it’s YOUR fault (the blame game)

It’s become so easy for people to transfer blame when needed. Granted pointing a finger is less effort than actually solving the problem or coming clean about issues but ask yourself, who is that really helping?

Not those who were wronged, I’m sure. They’re still there wallowing in their pain, hoping that someone at least says sorry. Not you, you’re in DENIAL. You’re gonna keep making the same mistakes unless YOU recognize they were your mistakes in the first place.

Take that girl you’re dating for example, you’ve been cheating on her for awhile and every time you get into a fight about it. You say she’s being too suspicious. That’s your fear of getting found out projecting onto her as a defense mechanism. (This is clearly a hypothetical guys. LOL. Calm down.)

Or

In my case, I’ve been procrastinating doing something really important, something I should have done for awhile now. Everytime it gets brought up I blame my health, my degree, circumstance. Name an excuse, I’ve probably already used it. Every single reason except the honest one, ME. I’m stuck. I think it’s easier to sit here and wait for things to happen than actually do something about it.

I’m having none of that anymore.

I’m just gonna pick up the phone today and start calling people I need to call to get my book out there. Yes guys, all this ranting is about a book- well, MY book. It’s a long shot but most dreams are.

I guess other than assigning blame on some external force, I let my fear of rejection cripple me. I’ve had my fair share of doors slammed in my face, professionally and not so professionally. *wink* I’ve learned to accept that, but writing, especially literature, is where I’m most vulnerable so I keep putting it off.

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Funny thing about rejection, it’s okay as long as you’re at a safe distance and you have a back-up plan. Remove those and you feel naked, stripped of a get away. That’s when fear sets in and you’re not sure what to do. If you’re ever in a position like this, FACE YOUR FEAR. Usually the thing we’re afraid of the most are the most gratifying to conquer.

Here’s a little nugget of wisdom from someone who has been in denial and afraid for awhile. Take responsibility for your actions, mistakes or otherwise. You’ll find your sleep more comfortable at night and your errors, whatever they were, tucked away in your experience chest. You never know, if you cheated or did something really bad to someone, you just might be forgiven. Sorry goes a long way. At least in my book, it does.

For the dreamers, don’t let fear take over your life. Don’t blame the lack of inspiration, opportunities or some other made-up story you know is just another thing to blame. Focus on the dream and JUST START.

You can be great if you choose to be.

the MOCKINGJAY lives

I’ve been waiting for this trailer for months and we all know why. Catching Fire was such a hit everyone’s waiting for the next one to soar or flop. If I was to base entirely on the trailer, I’d say the highly-anticipated movie will live up if not be SO MUCH BETTER than it’s predecessors. I swear that a little over a minute worth of video just about killed me so here’s the link and be the judge.

HERE ARE MY FAVORITE MOMENTS *faints*

'i never wanted any of this.'

‘i never wanted any of this.’

'HE'S ALIVE.' ME: it's okay gale.

‘HE’S ALIVE.’
ME: it’s okay gale.

'you will rescue peeta at the earliest opportunity or you will find another mockingjay'

‘you will rescue peeta at the earliest opportunity or you will find another mockingjay’

BEST CASTING CHOICES SINCE HARRY POTTER

BEST CASTING CHOICES SINCE HARRY POTTER

EFFIE IN REBELLION CLOTHES IS PRICELESS

EFFIE IN REBELLION CLOTHES IS PRICELESS

#TheMockingjayLives

#TheMockingjayLives

Raise your hands because   

May the odds be ever in our favor.

united colors of bullies

It’s been awhile since I last put up an entry and before I start sobbing and saying sorry for leaving you guys hanging, let me just say that I had a tough month writing 15 chapters of a book I’m hoping to publish. So please please put down the pitch forks, I’m not one to make excuses but my brain was fried (figuratively of course).

Today I thought it would be fun to write about a topic that inspired one of my book concepts and that is bullies– in all their colors and varieties. We already know about the obvious ones, which mind you are a scary lot but there are more subtle versions. They hide under the covers labeling themselves something more beautiful and attractive. The magpie in us grovel for the promise that it oh so boldly declares then we realize later on that the shine it has is all that it is, shine.

The inspiration came from a nostalgic evening of coffee with 2 of my best friends- after they convinced me to keep writing on this blog because THEY ACTUALLY READ IT AND LIKE IT. Imagine my surprise when they started talking about entries I wrote, I mean these are my overly critical, highly intellectual and difficult to please best friends we’re talking about. My self loathing subconscious found that difficult to believe and quite frankly, I was speechless for a few moments.

On the same night, we realized a lot about the path we took together in college. We gave up so much to be that image of an over achieving student whose main goal is to get the best grades, manage as many  extra curriculars and maintain as few creative, non logical pursuits as we can. Labels and expectations- the box they made for us- those were our bullies. 

photo from caity-bullying.blogspot.com

I’ve finally learned that bullies don’t just come in different kinds of people, they come in every shape, size or form. I may not have been shoved around or locked in a janitor’s closet by some teen fiction stereotype queen bee but I’ve been confined in a society where there’s a predetermined standard of beauty- one which some may claim I don’t fit. That norm, that belief, that is my own brand of bully. It follows me around, taunting me to cinch around my curves and smoothen my edges to fit this overused mold already made for me.

When I  found enough courage and fought back, told society to shove its size zero, fair-skinned, blonde perfection up their bums, another bully manifested from the shadows- one far stronger and more paralyzing than its predecessor. The firm grip of its manacle, over sized hands smother me with ridicule of how success has and will continue to elude me because the career I chose to love and devote my life to will not earn me millions, buy me a mansion or a jet-setting lifestyle

Your bullies may be far more frightening or life threatening than mine. I can’t be the judge of that and I won’t try to. If there’s one thing I took away from dealing with bully after bully, people and circumstances alike, they’re never as easy to deal with as they they seem on the outside. It’s a bully for a reason. They know your weakness and capitalize on it as much as they can so you’re hurt in the worst possible way. They planned the perfect, most gruesome way to twist and turn the knife they stuck to your heart so you’re left clutching at it, trying to rip it off and stop the bleeding.

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But if you don’t know already, let me be the first to tell you, you’re far stronger than any of your bullies. You have the ability heal and those battle scars will remind you every day of how you fought and how you deserve to be happy- HOW YOU’RE WORTH A LIFE YOU CHOSE TO LIVE and not one chosen by some thug or an unfortunate circumstance for you. 

You get one shot at life my friend, don’t let some bully take that away from you. 

THE FAULT IN OUR STARS MOVIE UPDATE

When I recommended The Fault in Our Stars some months ago, along with a huge side of fangirling over the perfection that is Augustus Waters, I might have mentioned that it was going to be a movie.

Well it’s official release date in most countries, including mine, is June 4th- today!

 

I cannot even begin to tell you how excited I am to finally see it after months and months of pining and stalking John Green for the latest updates. I’m gonna blog about it again after I see it but for now I just really wanna persuade you guys to come see it. Not only is the storyline amazing, Ansel Elgort playing Gus is a huge plus too.

Tell me guys what you think about it. 🙂