#PrideMonth entry 1: my best friend

Five years ago (in uni), I was blessed with the most amazing debate partner anyone could ask for, and he’s still one of my best friends. Everyday, I’m grateful that he is who he is and that I got to meet him. If there was anyone to discriminate against him – call him names, deprive him of rights, belittle him, I will not sit idly, and watch. I’ll make sure they (whoever they are) understand that no one deserves to be treated that way. As much as I can logically argue for rights, I would admit that LGBT, in particular, is a personal cause for me. When I hear people say that gays shouldn’t be allowed to marry or adopt kids, they’re saying that my best friend who, for the past tumultuous six years of my life, has been a rock and a supporter, is not good enough to reaffirm his love for another or build a family just because of his sexual preference. That, I cannot stand. Who you are and who you choose to love is not reason to be treated with any less dignity than any other person. You deserve to be seen as an equal because you are. 

#HappyPrideMonth

It’s time to strip and don the colors of the rainbow, people. It’s Pride Month! 

Every single one of my avid readers already knows that I’m a massive supporter of anything LGBT. I’ve talked about it on previous posts, written literature about it, even put up photos that signify my support for it (links below). If I could, I would wear a shirt that says ‘LGBT rights is human rights’ everywhere I went, but I don’t think my clients would appreciate me walking up a business meeting in a graphic tee.

BYE OUT THERE

But I do wanna celebrate this amazingly colorful month with you guys so I decided that I’m declaring this blogging month as an ‘All Pride Month’. It simply means daily posts (yes, yes it’s a huge responsibility) about anything pride-related – pictures, twitter trends, Youtuber features, movie recommendations, readings lists (paperback and Wattpad) and my usual opinions entries.

I want to make this as interactive as possible, so if there’s anything you want me want me to feature in the coming days, you can comment below or email them to me. Oh, and if you wanna show your support as well, feel free to make my rainbow header yours too.

That’s all for today, guys. Happy Pride Month!

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Graphics by: Rye Lee

Links (previous entries on LGBT): 

#unpopularopinion GAY RIGHTS

I haven’t posted in awhile for reasons I promise to reveal in future blogs but for now I’m back here with a new website name. I’ll be making some changes and you’ll see that in the course of the coming months. Exciting things, I promise. For now, allow me to talk about something that has been bugging since I saw this video:

The gist of it is Austin, an openly gay teenager from a private school, was called on by his principal to ask him to ‘go back in the closet’ from whence he came. It was an all out inquisition if you ask me, calling his parents as if he cheated on a test or something worse and told them that he had to delete all his posts on social media regarding his sexual orientation and basically act like a ‘normal’ dude, whatever that is.

We all already know how I feel about gay rights. Granted I was vague about why I became such a strong advocate in the first place but I never faltered about my stance on it. I would be lying if I said wasn’t seething when I first saw this video but the logical side of me calmed me down enough to write this entry.

There are merits to the principal’s decision, much as I hate to admit it. Writing that feels like swallowing salty water when you know you’re about to drown. It’s a private institution, with its own moral code or whatever bullcrap the admin or  board of trustees feed the students to blindly follow. The principal may have A. had his hands tied himself or B. he’s just as homophobic as the rest of his academic peers. For his sake, I hope it’s A. because all he’ll need to get over his lack of spine is a bit push in the right direction which I hope this entry does for him. If it’s the latter, then he has some serious learning to do because regardless of what he believes there was a better way of delivering this to a teenager already having a hard time. If this is how you let every person whose going through the same thing feel then you shouldn’t be dealing with coming-of-age teenagers who might already be picked on every day for who they are.

There are enough bigots in the world. Trust me, these kids don’t need reminding.

I was 16 when my best friend of 4 years came out to me. He came out to a whole group of people he just met at uni before he told me and to be honest with you it broke my heart. Much as I tried, I couldn’t talk to him for days the way I used to even if he was going back to school in a week. If you’re wagging your finger thinking I’m no different from that principal, you’re wrong. That’s not it at all although someone who knew me less would have taken it that way.

I’ve been replaying in my head over and over again what I did to make him feel like he couldn’t tell me. He said it wasn’t a big deal, that he would have told me anyway but he didn’t and I couldn’t help but feel that there was something I did that convinced him I won’t love him anyway or more because he was honest with me. Was it because I come from a pious Christian family? Is it because I was in an all girl religious group in high school? I couldn’t bring myself to talk to him because so much guilt was eating me up like some terminal disease and it made me feel so sick.

I never talked about this because since then I’ve had some traumatic experiences concerning other gay friends and how they’re treated. I’m not always proud of how I defended them so I  usually just avoided the topic altogether. I’m not much for emotions as most of you already know but I thought it was important to share what I realized after that.

I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING.

I’ve always felt strongly about gay rights, always defended them in my head, wrote stories I never published supporting them but that was it. I never did anything openly to reassure anyone in my life that I’ll be there for them, love them and support them regardless of what their sexual orientation is. Not since recently at least. It doesn’t mean shit if you fight for them in your head. They don’t know that because often those who criticize them are louder than those who rally behind them. It’s unfortunate but it’s a fact, one which I hope this small blog from some unknown corner of world changes in some little way.

So Austin I may not be able to convince the world to be kinder and more accepting of you and those just like you, much as I want to, but I hope you know that there’s one girl, insignificant as she is to the statistics of 7 billion people, who celebrates you for who you are. Who you choose to love is just one part of you, albeit and important one, don’t let them box you for that. The world will get over their ignorance one day and you should know that you’re one of the reasons why they did.

Stay strong Austins of the world. We’re slowly finding our voice to fight for you.


 

As for my friend, you know who you are. I hope you’re reading this and feeling how much you are loved. If, my dear readers, you want to make someone else feel the same, share this blog and that video. Show them that we’re better than the jerks who treat them badly. #niceinternet #supportgayrights

movie suggestions of the month

Heya.

This post is for those who enjoy a good old film just like me and would like to know which new ones to come see next. I’m gonna go over suggestions for movies that piqued my interest as much as I can because I know when a movie marathon ensues, it cannot be stopped.

Here goes.

1. The Normal Heart

So if you’ve been online often or watch a lot of TV, you’ve probably heard of this movie. It’s produced by Brad Pitt, starring Mark Ruffalo, Matt Bomer and Julia Roberts. (Not a bad looking cast, I know. I mean who doesn’t?) The movie explores the beginning of AIDS in the 1980s, the plight of the gay community to fight for their health, survival and rights, and the sociopolitical landscape the characters struggle to be heard in . It will push you to see the stark contrast and the obvious similarities of their stories from and to the present day.

2. The Maze Runner

This is the movie adaptation of the James Dashner’s world famous dystopian series which I talked about a few entries back. Here’s the link: https://byunanonymous.wordpress.com/2014/05/20/the-maze-runner-trilogy/. It’s one of my absolute favorite series and that says a lot because I hold dystopian novels to such a high regard. I’m keeping my fingers crossed, well everything else that can be crossed, that this becomes a success because it will be just frustrating to have a lackluster movie version of such a great book.

Another plus, especially to all Teen Wolf fans, Dylan O’brien is playing the lead role, Thomas. -winks-

3. Kill Your Darlings

The movie is based off a widely controversial murder in 1944 that threads together the life of three well known writers: Allen Ginsberg, Jack Kerouac and William Burroughs.  More than the crime is a story of choices and the consequences that come with it, where structure and form in life and literature isn’t as easy as black and white nor is it pretty as metered poetry.

If you’re a Potterhead and continuously support the amazing roles Daniel Radcliffe continues to play then this is definitely for you. I would say it’s one of his best portrayals to date. The film features the mysterious hottie, Dane Dehaan who is also know for his role in the Amazing Spiderman.

4. If I Stay

This teen romance movie is actually a recommendation from a twitter friend and it’s coming to theaters this 22nd of August. To most of you who know me, you already figured out that I really am not into the cheesy romcoms although I have my moments but trust me the plot of this one is actually pretty interesting. It follows the life of a sheltered girl, played by Chloe Moretz, who meets ‘THE GUY’ but unfortunately suffers a massive accident that forces her to a state of coma. While there, she finds reasons that will lead ultimately to her choice- to stay or go.

That’s it for now my lovelies and I will keep you posted for any more cool trailers and movie recos I chance up on. Oh and by the way, some movies in my reco list are out and available while the others, you have to wait a bit longer.

 

how to give it to him straight

(no pun intended)

Let me start by saying this isn’t an easy post. I went back and forth. I finally decided to publish it after having a long talk with my cousin who convinced me that this is indeed AN ARTICLE WORTH WRITING and that I shouldn’t be scared about what people will say or how they’ll react because I never was before this anyway.

 

I know. I think I’ve always known you’re gay and a part me of thinks you’ve known for awhile too. I won’t insult you by describing the times you made me realize it but like Bobby’s mom said, ‘You always know.’ I don’t know if in the many conversations we had, you tried to tell me. If you did and it didn’t work out or I just wasn’t listening well enough, I’m so sorry. I can get caught up in the noise sometimes and you know we’re a noisy crowd.

There are days when I feel so helpless because I can’t just hug you and tell you it’s gonna be okay. You haven’t even trusted me with your secret yet so all I could do is wait for the time when you’re ready. I wanted to write this for when that time comes. This will be the proof that I’ve always supported you, whoever you are and whoever you choose to love.

It won’t be easy because we still live in a society where you’re an anomaly (that word hurts me more than you know). Trust me when I say it’s all gonna be okay. I’m here for you. We’re all here rooting for you. When the harshest, most painful slings from others and even from people you love come, I promise to stand beside you and just be around for whatever you need.

I want you to know how much I love you. I hope when you finally get to read this you’ll be a proud, happy and free man.

photo from comingoutjournal.tumblr.com

I am reaching out to all those who were in my position or those in his. What should I do? I don’t want him to think no one cares. WE don’t want to make the mistake of just ignoring it but in the end make him feel unaccepted or that he can’t tell us anything.

 

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Note: Bobby from the entry is a reference to Prayers for Bobby a 2009 movie exploring the life of a closeted gay Christian finally coming out to his family and how being ostracized drove him to take his own life.